Going through hard times....

I just have the urge to share this

I've been through a lot in my life. having a disability and having to deal with that plus surgeries and special treatment and discrimination and just wanting to fit in but never truly did. Had daddy issues because I really didn't have a dad i was jealous of people who did including my sisters. Them my daddy issues turned into men issues and with that came heartbreak and an identity crisis then the identity crisis led me to some really dark roads, some roads that had me contemplating suicide.some led to not loving myself enough to say no. .. which led to darker roads.   I can either look at my life one of two ways.

1. I hate my life, the world hates me I keep making stupid decisions and i have nothing to live for.  Why is god doing this to me? ?  Why am I going through unnecessary bull crap ?
Or
2. Okay my life has its bumps and curves. I'm going to get over and around them and learn from the mistakes i do make and try not to make them again. God isn't the one doing this to me it's life. I have free will and the devil has free reign on the earth,  i can get myself in terrible situations & sometimes without even knowing, let the devil toy in my life. Instead of giving up thus letting satan win, I'll give god everything.

Keep in mind God allows us to go through certain things to either make us stronger or make us better. We gotta allow him to step in our lives and take over and he will, trust me. As much as I talk about my past to people,  I'm not proud of it but I am proud of who I've become out of it. I'm a woman who now trusts in god with all her heart and soul. Ever since I've given god all of me, yes I've gone through stuff but it's not nearly as hard or as bad as it's been in the past in fact it's easier to take things from what I go through and walk out of it with a smile.

People always ask me why I'm always so happy or positive.....  that...... that's why.